I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
