"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
