Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
organizing the empties. That sober.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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