Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize