is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Damn victory sex feels great
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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