Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
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