im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
