i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize