She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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