it was like eating out sand paper
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
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