I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
