the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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