I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize