Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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