Just mADE A PArabola og urine
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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