He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
