So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
