I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize
