Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
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