Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
vagina is talking i cant
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
