Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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