your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
