She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
