But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
you guys were way drunker than both of me
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize