He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
