we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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