I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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