But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
