Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
The police scanner is talking about you again....
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Randomize
