I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Randomize
