What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
im holly from the hills drunk
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Sorry about my life...
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
