you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
