It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
time to smoke my breakfast
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Randomize
