I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
