none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Randomize
