why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
