y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
i think im in europe. pls send help
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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