Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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