Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
