I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Randomize
