Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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