I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
