Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
