Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
