2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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