I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
