So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
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