I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
Randomize
