Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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