i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Tornado booty call.. dedication
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
PANTIES FOUND
Randomize
