I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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